i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
Racial profiling caused me to miss two cabs but the third cabs the charm - he's playing Jesus Music
babies were throwing up all over the place
i was just outside smoking and i saw a hooker sing "i wish i knew who your daddy was" to her new born baby. someone explain to me why i ever left chicago to go to college...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just realized i've been trying to levitate the potatoe chip out of her hand for the past ten minutes. i think i smoked to much.
Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
I either just got cockblocked or saved from a lengthy court case so I'm kinda conflicted about how my night went.
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I literally told her "she's a sandwich I'd like to make" and that's all it took
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
I don't know. I just have an affinity for nudity when I'm drunk.
How the hell am I supposed to tell that to a group of eight year olds?! It was three in the afternoon for fucks sake!
...Just this whole adulting thing gets in the way of mermaid drag shows at lesbian bars.
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
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