Woke up to a denim duvet cover this morning... why r guys so tacky?
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
Why wouldn't u just let me ride the washing machine
The least you could do before I go into your room is throw away the condom wrapper from the other girl I know you're banging.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
I've spent my afternoon dipping strawberries in DayQuil if that's any indication of where I'm at in life.
I got a hand job after work. Remember those? From the 90s...
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Listen, some people have dreams, some people just want to cock slap a kangaroo
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
I'm a little concerned about right now. You showed up at my house soaking wet, drunk with a bag of ham and 2 liter of Dr. Pepper, and you refused to tell me where you got the ham until I gave you some more liquor.
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
How do I tell my boss I have slutty fantasies about him, me and his conference room table?
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