We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
I'm currently bartering with this guy so I can fuck his bi girlfriend. We're at 5 pizzas and he gets to watch us make-out.
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
I fell down the stairs while taking the dog out last night. I was laying there with the dog licking me face and my neighbor just stepped over me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Man. Apparently I blacked out between the 4th margarita and my air mattress. Asleep in my jeans at 10pm. Mom outdrank me again.
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
I'm way too sober and people are way too heterosexual
I'm really sorry I bit your mom last night, it was completely uncalled for.
sober me is not impressed with the quality of people that drunk me gives our phone number to
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
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