Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
I can't believe all I ate yesterday was half a turkey sandwich and 20 finger licks of exctasy.
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So they're giving me a CT scan because I probably have a hernia. From getting a BJ from you. Really. This may be a pivotal moment in my decision to write a book about my life
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
Dude made his own urinal by punching a hole in the wall and pissing in it rather than waiting in line. That is the stuff of legends.
I seriously think I got run over last night.. My sides are bruised and I got a ride home in the limo from the office.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
Literally if she wants to make a big deal, I'd rather have shit smeared on my face.
Im eating leftover Easter ham in a bubble bath. What has my life come to?
Found a trail of Taco Bell hot sauce packets through the garage to our back door and cheese in my bra. I'll say it was a successful Sunday Funday.
So the 25yr old smokeshow I fucked last night said "Prepare to be disappointed" as he put the condom on. I was. 40 is bullshit.
So I had Xanax for breakfast & I'm probably going to fuck my tennis instructor.
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