It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
do you think there was ever a doctor who smelled his finger after giving a prostate exam?
We made a drinking game out of poaching eggs. When did our life turn into a really awesome version of Top Chef?
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
Sexual Frustration City, population: Me.
I just tried to give a picture of a dude a blowjob. through my computer screen. I was leaning forward with my mouth open and everything so WALK AWAY
I keep thinking your bag of thongs is a bag of chips. So mad I can't eat them.
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
My mom just asked me if I knew what Buzzfeed was. Then said she's watching the second Magic Mike for the bodies. Please help.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
You should've seen the look on the guys face when I demanded pho and a beer the second they opened. Obviously he doesn't understand hangovers
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
I made her pull the car over 5 times to puke because she was going to fast, apparently she was only going 30mph...
My ultimate hope is that people will hug me, smell me, and therefore think I'm classy.
I definitely almost just pulled a condom out of my purse instead of money for my dad.
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