what date should I let him know how fucked up I am?
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
The bartender gave me a roll of masking tape so I could tape my heels to my feet so I wouldn't lose them when i went drunk running later that night
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up and found 10 txts from him. All sent at 6:30 am, and all about the muffin man.
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
i just woke up to a text from him apologizing for making me eat a full lemon
I want a burrito.
Truly, you are the voice of a generation.
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
TSA literally pulled two bottles of whiskey out of my bag. Once he saw the leopard print socks and the mickey mouse tank, he put it back in my bag and said "Have a fun trip, man."
I did just chug a pint glass of wine during a solid round of masterbation, so I believe I am ready for bingo.
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
In hindsight, maybe rearranging his living room because he has OCD while he was out wasnt the greatest idea. Though it'll keep him busy for HOURS
Her oh Gods turned into oh god I shouldn't be doing this I'm engaged.
Randomize