I just spent $27 on things to pee on.
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I gave him 3 xanax and recorded the ball drop. He's gonna think tonight is New Years.
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
Well it's official... The first guy I ever gave head to now holds 2 world records. Should I text him asking if I can try and break my record?
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
NOBODY TALKS SHIT ABOUT PANDA EXPRESS
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
My life is over, I got a mugshot while wearing a shirt that said 'milf hunter'.
I mean, he’s listed as “Andrew DC Threesome” in my phone. THATS HOW I REMEMBER HIM! How is that not the start of a fairytale?
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
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