Dude I'm so glad we're not friends anymore. It would have made fucking your stepmom last night really awkward. Dickwad.
Next weekend I am getting a library card and staying my whore ass home.
your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How do you get a 7 on a pregnancy test?
I really want to know why half of my kitchen floor is missing.
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
Please stop hiding condoms in my house. If I want to have sex with you, I will let you know. FYI, my mom found the ones hidden behind the milk. She was not happy.
Her family was right next to mine during christmas eve mass. Between the terrifying glares and her trying to set my sleeve on fire during the candle part I am VERY sure she knows im fucking her ex...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I swear going to your house is like going to a strip club, no matter what happens I get glitter on me.
And then he said, "let's have sex and I'll send you home with enchiladas."
1. I'm excited for tonight 2. Do we dress up as pirates? 3. Happy Valentine's Day bae
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
He literally had a Trump sign in his front yard. I just can't now.
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
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