She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
I forgot not everyone drinks wine out of the bottle. My grandma just asked if i needed a glass with a disappointing look.
Can you pick me up a bottle of make-an-ass-of-myself tonight?
Do you want cuervo gold or silver?
You have to figure out where to put this turtle dude
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
Friends don't brand friends with cigars. It's not how it works.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just when I decided to go get a taco and a blunt cake it starts raining. Coincidence? or divine intervention?
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
Wait wait wait. You are actually taking advice from this lunatic?
This is the girl who got a balloon full of cocaine through security no questions asked. Of course I'm taking her advice.
Valid.
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
My psychiatrist just sent me a dick pic
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