I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
This girl named her kid Rainforrest. If I die, just know it was from laughing so fucking hard.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My third nipple is alarmingly under-appreciated.
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
Dude, sorry for live texting you my binge drinking. If you'd like me to do the same for my hangover, I can share that I just had to sit down while q-tipping my ears.
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it weird that I want to have sex wearing my glasses and lab coat while having an actual scientific discussion?
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
Your next boyfriend should be from MENSA...you're so smart, it's intimidating as fuck. My penis retracted in fear.
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
Protip if he licks the back of your knee and you reflexively kick him your game of 'lick the lady' is over.
Randomize