This old guy in denny's is sitting alone and he is looking at us and laughing for no reason
Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
Rubbed one out while on hold to buy tickets to Disneyland. Feel simultaneously like a freak and strangely productive.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drug-sniffing dog walked past me and my suitcase in the train station. My opinion: they need a new dog
You need to let me be on top sometimes. I gotta get rid of these love handles
I am broke enough to accept it. If I get poisoned, you can have my shoes
There are two women in my bed. I'm gonna have a bowl of noodles so I can better understand my success.
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Too stoned. Randomly can't get the image of Emilio estevez's smiling face out of my head. What is life.
Man, I'm real high and googling what all my favorite figure skaters from childhood are doing now.
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
if you and your penis don't hurry up, I'm getting drunk without you.
I was about to break it off with him because I realised he only wanted me for sex, until I realised that I only wanted HIM for sex. Win/win
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