who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
I told him to go down on me and when he did he started crying!! I asked him why and he said my vag looked just like his ex girlfriends!!!
I'm doing shots of crown out of a baby bottle. My friends are sensational parents.
Dude it was weird. The strippers vagina tasted kind of like your mother's.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
Remember that time we became friends because I shotgunned a Tall Boy in your bathroom?
Those memories are both hazy and awesome.
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
He looks like he's going to feed me a taco and then stab me. It's probably a good idea he's a lawyer
Do you participate in Sunday morning booty calls?
Dammit! I didn't see this message, of course I do.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
We are no longer allowed to have pre 4th party week. I woke up with a donut stuck to my face and 'MILF' written in black marker on my stomach.
Mother of the Year
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
First night in my new apartment and I threw up in front of my neighbors door. Starting off this relationship strong.
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
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