i just ate that cheese stick that was in my purse from last night.
just realized I'm too high to take the plastic off a slice of cheese....
I woke up and my clothes were soaked in the shower and I was wearing a Ghostbusters uniform. I'm shocked she hasn't left me yet.
Woke up on the floor holding a sandwich. Shots. Never again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm in this weird masturbatory haze making onion rings. If you want to come over we can eat these suckers and play TF2.
Why don't we hang out more often?
I bought an american flag today and by god im gonna fuck someone on it
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
I woke up the whole house screaming I need my shorts they found me in the kitchen with a bag of strawberries naked
I'm having a hard time eating my sandwich knowing how many different buttholes my hands were in last night.
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