your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
Just finished texting the 27th male name in my phone that i don't recognize. none of them were the hott kid i made out with last night. the search continues.
you drew a penis with ranch dressing. tried to take a picture of it and dropped your phone in it. Then made moaning sounds while you licked it off.
I woke up with a solved rubics cube in my purse
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish the inside of the tampon box said "CONGRATULATIONS YOUR NOT A MOTHER!"
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
Donald Trump and I would be so adorably orange together!
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He did a line of coke off my stomach then flipped me over and smacked my ass. Then, while he was talking dirty to me, he told me he wanted to hire someone to clean my room. And that's when he lost his boner. Life is so hard.
Last night apparently I said "I need a break" and then I just passed the fuck out for 3 hours
You tell anyone I'm rocking out to Pitbull in an economy, base-model car, I'll kill you.
Hey, it's Valentine's Day weekend and were single and off our periods. Let's live like queens.
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
We probably are going to die. So. Thanks for agreeing to be my Maid of Honor even though I torture you.
Randomize