Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
the maid of honor just got in a fight with the mother of the bride at a gas station across the street. best. wedding. ever.
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off?
I tried exercising today. I ended up masturbating to the Wii fit trainer.
I am going to be fat forever.
We should celebrate the resignation of Berlusconi tonight with too many bottles of wine and sambuca. We're allies, right?
I just found a hunk of ham in my back jeans pocket from god knows when. We gotta stop going so ham.
There is not greater feeling than lying to your boss and leaving work to shit in the comfort of your own home
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
Why did I see a weird snapchat of you barking at McDonald's last night?
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
That was before I lit my hair on fire
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