I just gift wrapped bread.
At least my shower head will respect me in the morning.
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was the textbook our-balls-touched-while-engaged-in-a-threesome-with-our-bosses-wife conversation.
It amazes and alarms me I'm not shocked to read that.
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
Like you know your sex life is in a downward spiral when your best friend offers to sext you from Ireland
he pulled my tampon string out with his teeth like a grenade pin yelling frag out! That's why I fuck guys back from deployment. They'll go the distance
Just had a customer call his drug dealer in front of me but act like it was normal call.
We're going to watch the inauguration and fuck. Or fuck and watch the inauguration, I'm not picky, just get your ass over here by ten.
Randomize