Got kicked out of the baseball game with a 4 officer escort. Not bad for a monday night.
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
I think being a buddhist has made me a better drunk
We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The a/c is broken so they cut a softball size whole in the freezer door. Goodbye deposit.
ALL CAPS CUZ ITS SERIOUS SHAME.
Im organizing a group to help fondle my shoe. Too many shots dude. Too many.
It's either gonna be a cock in my mouth or a burger. You decide which.
Although a guy bought me a shot of fireball last wknd and I told him he wouldn't even get half a handjob for that and walked away so don't tell me I don't have standards
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
SOME BITCH AT THE HOSTEL STOLE MY NUT BUTTER THERE WILL BE BLOOD
I bought the restaurant a boat airhorn to wake up sleeping employees.
I love you
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
So my best friends wedding ended with everyone seeing me getting eaten out behind the forbes church. Classy!
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