It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
My scrabble letters just formed failure. Thanks God.
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just came out of my room at 8 AM to find 2 pounds of raw hamburger and a half eaten cake strewn across the hallway. And I'm not surprised at all.
not the best booty call
did she squirt?
only if tears count
And THIS is why we get drunk. No good story, documentation, or event happens by eating a salad. Alcohol consumption leads to good things
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
My cast smells like cheese steak rolls
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When I am this hungover I become increasingly grateful for having my own private office
Stole my 7th stop sign and 3rd speed limit sign last night. Not even sure how because they were bolted to a cement wall. Tequila gives you strength you didn't know you had.
Currently rolling a blunt in the bathroom of Planned Parenthood
Tell me not to drink and get on ladders. I think I need the reminder.. I'm clumsy enough sober.
Well this guy just went into a detailed lecture about how rinos are developing into unicorns.. It's gonna be a good night.
Holy. Shit. I just remembered all the lapdances....
Randomize