i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
I didn't scare your mother by showing up on the roof, did I?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
Ok I am NOT pregnant. I could shove coal up my vagina and my uterus would turn it into a diamond in a matter of minutes
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
there was 'chicken suit porn' in my search history.......also 'scuba diving porn'
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Worse: texted mom-in-law by mistake that I sharted.
Worser: she offered to clean me up
He told us a story about a time his 80 year old uncle karate chopped a dick in a glory hole.
5 seconds ago I had no idea that a fart could travel so fastly thru the tanning bed. I taste it in the back of my neck.
Wine. Check.\nDino chicken nuggets. Check.\n#IssaParty
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
Went online to check my credit card... $147.87 at Waffle House. $632.36 at "Red Rose Gentleman's Club" and a $1000 cash advance from an ATM. I may no longer be a fiancé.
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