actually, I'm a sock model
You're my little dorito
Guess who is high enough to buy Jingle All The Way?
I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just got invited to smoke a bowl by a guy who has a prostetic leg and has been on the jerry springer show multiple times. I love my life right now
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
JOY: That feeling when you crack open a handle for the first time, and the flow limiter comes off with the cap.
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
Got caught peeing in public. Sucks. It was a police station. Sucks worse.
you kept shouting 'jesus penis' when i was on the phone with 911
My vagina is the only part of me that is pleased you lived through last night.
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
Drunk twilight is the only twilight
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