I feel like if im whacking off more now that i have a gf than i did when i was single, somethings wrong.
Omg. If Ina Garten Makes roast chicken one more time im going to strangle her with her white button down
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Literally he has the smallest penis I've ever felt since 8th grade.
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
My spanish isn't great but I'm pretty sure he was calling me a "little monkey" while I was blowing him
Chasing a shot of svedka with a clementine is NOT the same as tequila w lime...
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You work today? I woke up with a raging boner that was whispering your name
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
my vag sweat smells like doritos
so now that we're not dating you have to stop sending shit like this to me okay?
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
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