Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
You can call me Bill Clinton. I brought 2 good looking Asians home last night.
you know it is a bad morning when you forget to brush your teeth and eat old gas x in your car because its minty...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A good Q tip ear swabbing is better than bad sex.
I knew he was a nice guy, because when we switched positions he flipped the mattress so I wouldn't have to lay in a pool of his sweat.
I'm drinking carlo rossi straight from the jug. I don't have any clean cups...how am I still at this point in my life...
I was really excited when he said that condoms didn't fit him, then he added "they fall right off"...
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So, I'm stoned at his house petting the neighbors cat I made him steal.
You're a fucking train wreck.
Put an egg in my coffee filter this morning. I think I am still drunk.
New war strategy! The ex-girlfriend of my ex-girlfriend is now my twice a week booty call!
I fell asleep while eating jimmy johns last night and then woke up at 5am and continued to eat it
Thank you for being so charming, but do you have syphilis?
I accidentally just texted my dad asking if he wants to do shrooms with me. Do I leave the city now or...
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