come pick me up. please. i just puked in my lap. bring pants.
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices.
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
It's just not a Friday night unless I'm getting propositioned by a guy in a wheelchair via Facebook messenger...
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Then we woke up and they shouted "Emergency Vodka!!" and that's how we got redrunk.
Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
I DONT WANT YOUR DICK. I WANT BRUNCH.
Can I just buy you sex toys as a wedding gift? Bc I’m here for that and you
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
one nice thing about being home: no walks of shame, just drives of shame
Randomize