whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
New plan, instead of sleeping with her, I'm just going to use her to sleep with the entire sorority.
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
no i brought the cat to the bar. I got a weird look when I walked in but now everyone loves her.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
OK. i'm going to add "riddle me this, brodawg" to the list of things i'm never gonna say to my boss again while i'm high.
I'm too stoned to come over for sex
Yes that is a Krispy Kreme doughnut on my cock
I'll be right over
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
Just had to break it to that one guy that I can't sleep w him bc he looks identical to my brother. So how's your morning?
I cannot, in good conscience, let you talk to a guy who wears Chaps and a knit beanie
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
Blacking out in the security line at the airport is not nearly as fun as blacking out in the lunch line at the dining hall.
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