Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
Just taught my suite how to queef. I feel like i'm back in 9th grade!
Thank GOD those kids were having a lemonade stand, I didn't have anything to wash down my plan b with.
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
Ice that vagina down, get some coffee, and try not to walk with a limp. It's time to dominate, pull it together
Dying on my bathroom floor at 7 am, I would rather be eaten by a shark right now
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
Muscle is literally tearing itself off of my shins. No I am not going on another bar crawl with you.
I'll pay?
Pick me up at 9.
My tights ended up on the driveway folded neatly. Any ideas how that happened?
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
Come over. Bring drugs. My sister is making cookies. She took Valium. They should be badass cookies.
the person she was housesitting for had a christmas card from charlie sheen on the fridge so we fucked on the couch and just slept in the bed
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