that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
You were so hammed, you asked your buddy in Economics to plot a demand curve for Parmesan Cheese.
At least I tried to be smart when I brought the alarm clock into the bathroom just in case I fell asleep.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah I was convinced everyone knew I was high. Time was passing way too slowly for anyone NOT to notice.
Just so you know, your wedding is in the same place I gave my first bj.
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
It turns out my English teacher used to pose for Playboy. She's an inspiration.
This girl I interned with got engaged today and I'm just like over here taking plan B with my tacos and PBR.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
It's not even 8pm on a Friday and I've already got a guy to tell me how big his penis is. Watched anything good on Netflix lately?
Can you get the dildos out of the shower before the maids come?
I'm eating an ice cream cone and pooping. Don't know how I'm gonna wipe.
Randomize