never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
I woke up and there was 3 different size condom wrappers on the floor. What is this goldie locks and the 3 condoms???
to cover up your slurred speech you tried talking like the creepy old man from family guy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
nutella sex= disaster
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
He had the Transformers symbol tattooed to his chest. We had to do it doggy style so I could laugh into my pillow instead of his face.
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
I need to figure out how to tell my doctor that I don't want to fix my possible fertility problems until AFTER I'm done whoring around in my 20s.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think winning the long island race means you lose at life
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
I don't mean to insult you, but did you leave your training bra in my bedroom last night?
I forgot to tell you. Your neighbor was walking his tiny dog and saw me crawl out of my jeep drunk vomiting and holding onto my bumper. He just said: morning! all friendly.
Being hungover in this office is the actual worst. Like they look at me and know I was wasted at 1 am, karaokeing Billy Idol at a gay bar.
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
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