it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
you were passed out in your cheese fries by the time he brought out your second order of french toast.
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All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
You're going to have to tell him your name isn't Ivor McTruckson eventually.
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What's the standard Christmas present for six months of booty calls?
Mobile recharge?
I just try to date guys based on what I need like I am trying to find an electrician now
You gays are geniuses
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
I blew past the Governor's motorcade going twice the speed limit and DIDN'T get a ticket. God wants me to get laid.
I know that you sometimes make decisions based on comedic effect, but losing your virginity shouldn't be one of them.
Upon further investigation my nipples are bruised and I have teeth marks all over.
Randomize