I'm at taco bell and they have a hiring sign asking "do you like to melt things?" clearly they only want the ambitious.
Good ideas don't start with we have a bottle of vodka..
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You stole a fry from a complete stranger. He wasn't happy. Then you said fuck it and stole the whole poutine and ran down the street while he stared in shock.
I threw up in a Buffalo Wild Wings and then got a high-five. I really don't understand America
Need to spend sober time with him while fully clothed. I can't decide if he's a seriously amazing man or a complete fucking dickbag.
This is me not judging you for what a fine line you draw between the two.
Everyone is like kids first day of school and I'm over here like I need to stop sleeping with random
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
she is currently in the shower drinking a beer and dancing to a song called "the penis song" my roommate is cooler than yours
If it were up to me his wife would never get his penis again, but I guess they have some sort of arrangement
Yes, an arrangement called marriage
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