I printed and framed a picture of a seagull shitting, and hung it in my house. I'm waiting to see how long it takes everyone to notice.
The verizon commercial has a magical pinata. Candy just keeps coming out. It must be a portal to a candy universe.
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
i'm at the st pattys day thing. the bar is packed. they just put on celine dion its all coming back to me now. i'm screaming the words.
it's 1 pm.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
Just realized the fur coat I am wearing to the wedding is the one I had sex with the groom in
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
my heaven will be filled with hot naked men covered in chick-fil-a sauce and me wearing a bib
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I've consumed in the last 24 hours is cranberry vodka and kosher for passover biscotti
That's what happens when you party with the tribe
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
I'm in the recliner and i have a bottle of wine wedged in my cleavage, drinking from a straw. Clever and classy or pathetic and sloppy?
they were drunk. and loud. and now they're drunk and quiet. or dead, you never know.
I love how we can bond over the fact that we're the only ones who think the guy I drunk hooked up with looks like Voldemort
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Randomize