Yeah we had sex for the first time last night and all the text he sent me afterwards said was “heh”
I got vodka in my stocking. Having an alcoholic mom has paid off.
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
I don't have any food so I made a martini so I could eat the olives. Don't tell me I can't think outside the box.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
So that groomsmen was naked under his kilt. Also I just had sex in the elevator. And yes, those two updates are definitely related.
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
stoners and superglue do NOT mix
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
Nothing like putting a Percocet up your nose because you spent your night drinking heavily and can't drink water to make you heavily reconsider your life choices
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