sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
i found the vodka. it was hiding in the orange juice.
I feel like I should limit myself to one meal prepared from a box per day
I only broke up with her because the ex sex is amazing. She will do ANYTHING if i even hint at getting back together
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You kept asking who was the good cop and who was the bad cop, you said you only wanted to talk to the good one
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
He stumbled out of the bar bathroom at 3:30 am with his jeans unzipped and his dick hanging out - it was the physical manifestation of "blackout with your cock out"
Tried to figure out where I was without opening my eyes this morning for like twenty minutes. Not even close. Not even the right state.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just heard myself say the sentence "I'm gonna go to the bank then take a nap". 8 year old me just slapped my present self through the space-time continuum for being an old fuck.
Driving you two to the party with a keg belted into the back seat has given me a brief glimpse of parenthood. I am now more resolved than ever to never breed, so thanks for that.
I was just asked by a police officer to not come back to Lancaster...
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
I was in line at Panera when I got the pic you sent to your coworker. I just showed your vag to a soccer mom. The vibrator was a nice touch.
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