So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
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do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
Taking my infected piercing out in the parking lot of the food card place. This is one of those life defining moments that makes me sad.
My ex wife just asked to go over our divorce papers and for sex in the same text
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
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When I said tequila slammers would be the death of me, I didn't intend it to be today. Oh god.
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
I'm done being drunk I wish I could snap my fingers and be sober
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
Like when your most normal sex dream is you being a prostitute, you know it's been one long ass dry spell.
We are so disgustingly codependent and I wouldn't have it any other way
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