I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
I don't even have to sign up for karaoke at duncans anymore. The karaoke ppl just sign me up themselves. Without my consent. I also sang stacys mom to some lady named Stacy who's mom died yesterday.
they duct taped my keg cup to my hand with my sister's phone number on it. I should be ok tonight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
Don't worry we did the "promise to get an abortion" handshake
Bro, I just want to tell you that I'm glad you got fired. I'm going to fuck your replacement.
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
He scratched off my spray tan. Literal nail marks down my back. Can't imagine what's underneath his fingernails.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have never heard someone not give a fuck so poetically in my life. I feel like you should be leading men into battle with a speech like that
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
I'm not really made for random hookups.. i'm like a swan.. i don't wanna have random swan sex. i just wanna have one swan hubby and fly around the world together and eat bread that people throw at us..
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
It was a blind-side dick pic.
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