A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
Apple Jack is not a good idea for breakfast. Whiskey can't replace milk.
you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the fact that my dorm room overlooks a children's daycare is enough initiative for me to have safe sex.
Best dream ever last night. You moved here. Your Spanish name meant highway. Your favorite food was styrofoam.
Thank god the bicycalist i hit was on drugs
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
its weird that my cat bites every fat chick i bring home. i repeat every fat chick, qhT KINDA FRIEND ARE YOU
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your mother liked my album on facebook that's only filled with drunk pictures. I don't know what to feel about this
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
You’re like one of those doomsday preppers, but for your vagina
I woke up and couldn't find her. She had somehow managed to get into the closet and lock herself in. She was crying for her boyfriend. Thirsty Thursday at its finest
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