That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
Arguably, the best part was cockblocking those squirrels.
your philanthropy is ruining my sex life.
That's the girl I met who was peeing on the driveway with me. We bonded
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
Drunkenly bought a $240 realtor course last night. Apparently even drunk me thinks my future is going nowhere
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can wear a rubber suit at three am and spank someone's ass until its sore and fuck them three ways from Sunday. And get up the next day and do their laundry. As long as once in awhile they rub my back without expecting anything
I want to name my colorful bowl Batman. Why? I still have yet to figure it out. But I'm calling it Batman.
This has to be the weirdest conversation I've ever had sober and in the middle of the day before.
I'm sorry I put my balls through your watch. On another note your roommate had them on his shoulder too sry
I want to fling myself into the sun
Is it weird that I'm mad at my boss because he isn't paying me enough attention? Maybe my dad issues are worse than I thought
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