now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
He was dressed in a pink dressing gown feeding people ketamine from a plastic sword he called Excalibur. how was your Monday?
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
I'm sitting here bra-less eating jalepeno candied bacon. You know you want this.
Coming.
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
Pretty sure this ice cream truck is following me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wonder what dick looks like without astigmatism?
As much as my throat was opened up this weekend, you'd think I wouldn't nearly choke on a damn almond.
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
Why did I not realize how important my fridge was till I was drunk. It keeps all my food cold its like my own cold box
I now have scissors specifically made for cutting dicks off.
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