I really liked your hair last night but that style makes it really hard to hold it while you puke
I was born with a shot glass in my hand
Her vagina should come with caution tape.
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I decided to buy a keg of Miller Lite instead of paying the electric bill. Just thought I'd give you a heads up...
So I just told the bartender I would go down on her. You need to get here
I woke up at 4 am to my roomate peeing all over my clean laundry. He thought he was in the bathroom and yelled at me for being in the bathroom with him while he was peeing.
Hide in the closet. if you hear me yell patato salad come out swinging.
if it doesnt flame it aint got game is a bad drinking motto eyebrow-wise.
eyebrows regrow, your balls dont
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
I'm at a gyno in Japan. Safe to say every possible rule of etiquette is about to be broken. Buckle up, motherfuckers.
There was so much jailbait at the festival that there was no other option but to drink my morals away
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
I fell into the fireplace. That is a pretty good sign to stop drinking fireball
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