You're going to have to start masturbating with your left hand. Or with someone's vagina
You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
if i hear one more christmas song, i will fucking shoot myself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The chick who threw the party was all pissed cause she thought I made out with her boyfriend. Admittedly, I did, but she was throwing up and crying at the time so she really can't be that mad.
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
I'm spending tomorrow doing taxes and making jello shots. Is this adulthood?
The lowest point of my life has been reached. I just drank half a jar of pasta sauce.
I put purple lights under my bed and asked him if he wanted to fuck in a spaceship.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
While he was at a job interview yesterday, I was dropping acid. So that's the aesthetic of our relationship rn.
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
We're like a married couple, but we only have sex on college holidays and other people's birthdays.
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
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