Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
He asked for his proof of insurance and he pulled out a Magnum by mistake. All of the sudden gignger was looking real good to me.
you would think someone who fights for his country could fight to last longer than 2 minutes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i feel like you're just hanging onto the edge of functioning wino.
This is your monthly public service announcement that sexual services will temporarily cease from Wednesday night to Monday. Please plan accordingly and have a nice day =D
he broke off your car antennae to use as a walking stick before he smoked because he claimed to lack the facial strength needed to open his eyes when he's high
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
If I get aids I am starting a lawsuit against snapchat.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah, he's passed out in my bathroom pantsless. Is it a faux pas to look at his penis?
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
I just woke up naked next to a GetGo sandwich and I can hear my cats are eating my combos. So that's my life.
My brain and heart say thanks but my vagina isn't super pleased with you right now
I couldn't even tell you how many times I've said "wrong hole" today
The most awkward thing in the morning is seeing your teacher's dick right before you go to his class.
Randomize