Are you drinking alone?
no, i'm watching house
That doesn't count.
wtf, then i'm always alone
Do you need to be saved?
No I think I'm God
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
Until he has ordered mozzarella sticks & beers at 2pm while wearing formal attire, then this is still my bar.
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To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
Umm, ya, half our class is sitting in starbucks passing around flasks. Yes, flasks. Plural. Going to join them, we're all giving oral presentations in 20. Go hard or go home.
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
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I don't think people appreciate how hard it is to fuck in a portapotty. Sarah and I had train for that shit.
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
Currently standing at the bus stop in just a pillowcase and its fucking snowing
Trying to figure out these fractions. I bought 5 fifths of gin last week. Does that mean I have one whole gin? 5/5 = 1, right? You're having to homeschool your kids right now--so ask them.
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