I told my rommate that he was pissing on his bed. He said "ok man" and took a step backwards and continued. He then went back to bed.
Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
You should have seen her outfit yesterday. It was like pretty woman before Richard Gere gave her money to buy a new outfit.
Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I remember who won the superbowl tomorrow morning.. I think I'm just going to quit drinking. There really won't be a point anymore
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
It's like she can't drink without using a flambongo
Tell me right now I did the right thing by not fucking my sick gf at 3 am with her family home... Tell me my balls hurt for noble reasons.
If sitting in the car passing a flask back and forth because the bar we go to is having some power issues on Christmas eve isn't Christmas spirit, then I don't know is.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
I told him you're making deviled eggs for the party. Sisters make deviled eggs to get their sisters laid. It's science.
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
Chasing shots with airborne.. Gonna get rid of my sickness and my soberness.
Randomize