Looks like an M-80 went off in a lb. of pastrami
right as i was about to introduce them she goes "old fuck buddy, meet new fuck buddy."
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
dude I'm not 100% but I think your mom is sexting me.
Eating an ice cream sandwich while your little bro gets me weed. May I adopt him?
So good news, aparently I blacked out and tried to go in the back of the mcdonalds to thank the people for makin my fries
btw telling the cab driver, that took you to your booty call that is now returning your wallet that you left in his cab, that you want to hug him is awkward
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was so high the sounds of a cricket drove me out of my home at 4am.... Boo that fucking cricket
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
Every guy I've ever fucked is single right now
Pray for me
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
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