I'm so bummed I missed coconut bowling. It's fucking cold here and no coconuts to be found
I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
Showering in the handicapped shower. Im THAT hungover.
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
Why are there hooting douchebags outside my building? Did a sport happen again?
I gave him my yeast infection. HOW THE FUCK DOES THAT EVEN WORK?
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've woke up with the same hoodie on backwards, twice this week. I think that's a record
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
Not sure if buying Twisted Teas for the alcoholics posted up outside the gas station counts as paying it forward but I am optimistic.
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
Randomize