We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
did not feel like going to store to get condoms last night so went to her pantry and got a sandwich bag and a rubberband
did it work?
nope
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Got one of only two perfect scores in the class on the quiz I took drunk. This is not a good thing for me to have learned about myself.
toilet paper cling ons are not as adorable as the little red cub makes them look on the charmin commercials.
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
He said he was walking down to the White Castle for sliders, still drinking straight from a 750. He came back two hours later pushing a grocery cart that had two puppies in it.
The puppies promptly had the squirts all over the living room, as he had fed them the sliders.
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think we have it figured out.. She's my wife when she's here and gives me advise on how to get ass when she's 1500 miles away.
THEY DIDN'T THROW MY PORN AWAY!!!!
Those people that talk about exercise endorphins have never experienced a 9x13 pan of mac n cheese endorphins
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
I think you'll appreciate my way of waking up today: Under my cubicle, boxed in by boxes of printer paper, and hung over. I don't even know how the fuck I got in here in the middle of the night. I went to my car and fell back asleep. I'm now 2 1/2 hours late.
Just blew on a shot of whiskey to cool it off, like it was soup...
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