so I was thinking like, Rob Pattinson could make so much money whoring himself out dressed as Edward Cullen.
yeah, I mean if he's down to fuck a lot of fat chicks and stare at Tiger Beat posters of himself above the bed...
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
Successful New Year's Eve:: Your first shower of the year is on Jan. 2nd... 'cause you didn't trust yourself to stand up long enough on Jan. 1st. Hello 2010.
i can't believe i brushed your teeth last night. so drunk.
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no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
Haha! You know I mean that in a positive way. Like, "let them eat cake!" Or in our case, "let them achieve obesity from the two entree plate at Panda Express!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
If you sleep with another manager before the year is up you'll deserve an accomplishment sticker.
So red wine goes with eggs, right? Because that's all I have in the house to cook and the drinking options are either wine or scotch
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
Mom got drunk as hell, crashed Dad's wedding and some how left with the best man. This is why you should be glad you aren't my sibling.
Fuck you bitch. You're married. You got a live-in dick at home for your needs. I still gotta surf this shitty town's bars for cock
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