And whoever invented the condom should be put to death.
The only way I made it through work was reminding myself how many margaritas per hour I was making
its taking every last moral i have not to steal this bike
you still have morals?
Well actually itd just be too hard to ride the bike with this large rake i just stole
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The plus side of face planted at the tailgate was that no one could see my nipples hanging out.
you sat up and said "i'm the worst kind of roommate, the drunk kind"
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Saw 2 lesbians fist fighting outside the bar tonight. I was startled yet slightly turned on
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
Correction: Jimmy johns. The one pita pit employee has been an asshole to me ever since you locked them out of the store
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
Ever had one of those went so hard last night you woke up at the foot of the bed naked wondering where your phone ended up?
The guy in the cage next to me is having phone sex. His girlfriend is in College Library. Why is my life ridiculous.
Randomize