office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
I thought you'd have died of alcohol poisoning years ago! How'd you get my number?
apologized to him about 10 times for being drunk. told him about 15 times that he was "really pretty"
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My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
I may have farted on a group of children. It may not have been an accident.
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
I'm sad that I feel like I need to temporarily change your name in my phone from Smashley until you have the baby and can be unsober with us again.
Him naked in my bed with a bottle of vodka in one hand, a pipe in the other, and a rose in his mouth.
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There's a guy running dressed as a bunny toward your house.
Eating pizza in the bath tub while watching a romantic comedy alone. I reached a new level of single.
He lit my hand on fire and bought me chicken nuggets. I'm in love.
Mike's not allowed to drink vodka anymore. He couldn't get his temporary tattoos (stickers) to stick so he super glued them on.
my night went from a boring school play to hotboxing a car with 3 criminals
Wait you took his virginity AND broke his bed doing it
I know! I’m the best!
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