And then she said "sorry if my vagina smells like fish, it's just active."
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
They won't let us do straight shots of 151 since that guy lit his face on fire.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What I'm trying to say is, that time you chained me to my dresser and made me beg for it was incredibly romantic.
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
I feel like we need a drunken piñata bash with your face being the piñata and my hopes and dreams being the stick
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
I just did the walk of shame in monkey slippers in the snow
Teach me the song of your people
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
I invited him to my hotel room via snapchat. I'm one hell of a classy bitch
What shade of lipstick clearly states, I'm only attending this wedding for the drugs and groomsmen?
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
It's been a week I should not still be finding glitter in my pants.
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
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