Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
I'm eating my emotions. I am no longer interested in anybody other than my own hand and vagina.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You're the only person I know who would be upset about making out with a girl you like. You're like a drunken Charlie Brown.
She's relieving herself in the laundry room. I'm really hoping there's a toilet in there...
I SHOULD NOT BE HAVING AN EXISTENTIAL CRISIS OVER PIZZA
I am about five seconds from ripping off my clothes and throwing myself into the ocean to become a mermaid
I'm about to eat a 2month old weed brownie I just found in my lax duffel bag. will you answer if I call you in like an hour and a half
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
Every Easter every single one the baby Jesus butt plug comes up
Excuse you? I'm an asshole at least 90% of the time. Get it right.
There was a woman who drank mouth wash to get drunk during her supposed detox...this is def the internship for me!
I'm sittin in my Hawaiian shorts watching the office eating cold asparagus. wow do I suck when you're not here.
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